You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
