i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
