nut hugger
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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