so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
