What did we do last night that was yellow?
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
