Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
