what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
