First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
