some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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