i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
