Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
