Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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