As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
