It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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