I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
