Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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