She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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