I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
