he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
