just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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