you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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