I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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