well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
