absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize