Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize