Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
