I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
