chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just gargled with NyQuil
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
