there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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