oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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