He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
