If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
