NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Randomize
