Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
