we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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