did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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