Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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