I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
she pinky promised me she was 18
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
