come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
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