sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Randomize