Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
