It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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