So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
COCAINE IS GR8
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
