please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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