Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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