A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
