this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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