He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
