butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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