The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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