You really coming over, don't trick.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
