I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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