Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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